Rape Apologism Ends in Suicide

Ashley has the outrageously disturbing, senseless and tragic story of a young woman who was raped and later committed suicide, and whose parents are now suing her college alleging that they didn’t do enough to prosecute the rapists.  A description of the assault (trigger warning):

Wright was allegedly raped after leaving a party in a residence hall in May 2006. The lawsuit claims students were openly consuming alcoholic beverages in violation of school policy. After the leaving the party, two young men steered her from her room and brought her to another room where the three men named in the lawsuit took turns raping her. The lawsuit says other young men were watching and high fiving each other at various times during the assault.

The lawsuit also says: “While Megan Wright was still in the room, one of the assailants exited the room and held up a white sign, which purportedly contained Megan Wright’s signature, to the surveillance cameras so that the camera could pick up the works printed on the sign above the signature: I WANT TO HAVE SEX.”

According to the lawsuit, the next morning, Wright woke up believing something was wrong. She had a vague recollection of the events of the previous evening. She noticed that she was wearing different clothes and was sore and bleeding in the vaginal area. Wright went to White Plains Hospital where an examination confirmed that “substantial injuries, including bruising and lacerations, indicated forcible rape. The nurse on duty that day, in fifteen years of practice, has rarely seen a victim evincing more physical trauma than Megan Wright.”

In all of my writing/reading/learning about sexual assault, perhaps nothing has ever convinced me so quickly and strongly that a person is guilty of rape than his holding up to a security camera a sign that says I WANT TO HAVE SEX and is purportedly signed by the victim.  It’s up there in eye-witness, DNA-evidence territory.  In fact, one might assume that such a flagrant and ill-conceived attempt to refute rape charges would be the rapists’ one big mistake.

But, amazingly, appallingly, and sickening, no, it apparently was not.  It seems to have been the smartest thing that these pieces of shit could have done. (emphasis mine)

The lawsuit says Dominican College never conducted its own investigation. It directed Megan to pursue the investigation with a detective in the Orangetown police department who, unbeknownst to Megan at the time, was employed by Dominican College as an instructor.

The detective took a writing sample from Megan by asking her to write the words: I WANT TO HAVE SEX. In his police report, the detective indicated that his refusal to investigate the assault was due, at least in part, to the fact that he believed that Megan’s handwriting matched the writing on that sign.

A detective from the District Attorney’s office also met with Megan. According to the lawsuit, shortly after that meeting, the detective told Megan and her mother that the case was difficult to prosecute because the physical trauma did not make her unrecognizable and there were no eye witnesses to Megan’s attack. She further advised that, although detective believed in her, the alleged assailants had retained attorneys who would not permit them to be interviewed by the DA’s office.

Well, speaking of pieces of shit . . .

Here’s a fucking clue, “detective”: if a man feels the need to go out into the hallway and hold up a sign expressing a woman’s written consent so to prove that he’s not committing rape . . . he’s committing rape. Is this really so difficult? Do normal, non-rapists wake up every morning and spontaneously say “just in case you were wondering, I totally didn’t rape anyone last night. Honest!”?  Because I’m entirely convinced that they don’t.  And here’s a clue to the guys out there who think that these men may be innocent: if you feel the need to hold a sign up to a security camera in order to prove that you’re not committing rape . . . you’re committing rape, you scumbag fuck.  You’re welcome for the advice.

Of course, what most likely happened was that Meagan was drugged or very drunk, and tricked into writing a statement in that state.  Furthermore, the “detective” (no, seriously, this is the worst detective ever, I’m not giving him the courtesy of actually respecting his title as though he’s someone who does his job) seems to miss the fact that the victim at some point writing down on a piece of paper the words I WANT TO HAVE SEX above her signature doesn’t mean that she wanted to have sex with the three men in that room with her.  The sign didn’t say “I want to have sex with John Doe, Bob Smith and Bill Jones all in a row, while other men watch, on this date of . . .”  Even if the sign did somehow “prove” that she wanted to have sex — and I think any reasonable person would agree that it does not — it doesn’t prove that she wanted to have sex with those guys.  And no matter what, she always had the right to revoke her consent at any point.  A written statement doesn’t change that.

Of course, all of this is using logic.  In the world of rape apologism, if any woman ever wants sex at any point in her entire life, then it means that she is available to any and every man who comes along.  The woman wanted sex!  Well what a slut.  That probably means that she likes sex, too!  Which totally means that she would like rape.  And if the woman happened to want sex that very evening, then of course she consented to sex with three men all at once while other men watched!  Because a woman can’t want sex and simultaneously turn down any potential partner who expresses an interest.

After all, this is the same “detective” who allegedly (and believably) said that even though Wright apparently had some of the worst rape-related injuries that a nurse of 15 years had ever seen, it wasn’t enough.  Because her attackers left her identifiable.  In other words, ladies, if you want to win your rape case, you better also be murdered and horribly disfigured!  In which case, your rape/murder won’t be prosecuted because they don’t know who the fuck you are.

Then there’s the inconvenient little fact that the security camera also allegedly proves that there were eyewitnesses, watching the attack from the doorway and giving each other high-fives. Oops.  But hey, what do little things like “facts” matter when you’re deliberately out to proclaim that a rape allegation is false?  And lord knows that if a woman isn’t raped in front of a room of upstanding citizens — so upstanding, one would presume, that they didn’t even try to stop the rape — then her rape isn’t prosecutable.  Why?  You’ve got it: bitches lie, of course.

The rapists are still walking free.  Since there is no victim to testify now, I imagine that they will remain that way — at least until they choose another victim who decides to report in a district where authorities give a shit.  This “detective” still has his job.  The school is deny, deny, denying — and in spite of sending Wright to an investigator with direct ties to the school, still seems to have its reputation in tact.  And Meagan Wright is dead, as her family believes, because of these horrid facts.  Because she was raped and the people who she needed to care and give a shit didn’t.  Because she was traumatized, ignored, and blamed for what was done to her.

And she deserved better.  Women deserve better.

0 thoughts on “Rape Apologism Ends in Suicide

  1. Jha

    What horrible bullshit. It’s tear-inducing, the frustration that comes from reading this sort of thing and not being able to do anything about it. It has to stop, but the rape culture is such a big thing, it sometimes feels like we need to wipe humanity off the face of the earth and let nature start over again.

  2. Kristen

    Aaaaarrrrgggghhhhh…I just want to fucking scream!!!

    Next time I hear someone talk about how victims MUST go to the police or their are Very-Bad-People, I am linking to this story.

    THIS is why I don’t encourage women to go forward if they don’t want to.

  3. Paul

    There was something similar a few years ago – involving coerced “consent” in a video recording – disgusting whenever it happens

  4. Chloe

    I am sick to my stomach over Megan Wright. How someone in HICKVILLE Rockland County could take away this girlss FREEDOM & LIFE. This time involving a 19 year old girl trying to get ahead with life by going after a college education not too far from home and these ANIMALS taking away her freedom and life.But the best part of this is how the SCHOOL ( maybe 4th rate at best) and Police department one of the BEST PAID in the STATE handled itWhat I want to know is why the detective on the case who is also a part time professor at the college allowed to be on the case. Hasn’t anyone ever heard CONFLICT OF INTEREST! Furthermore, the college wont release survaillance tapes of the dorm that night. HMMMMMMMM what are they hiding? Or better yet who are they hiding. Or HOW MUCH MONEY ARE THEY HIDING!!!! Their precious scholarship jocks who are at a best a step above dog in the HUMAN/ANIMAL CHAIn. Who are at 4th rate college with no possibility of ever making the NBA. What LOSERS. Will they ever even graduate or just drop out and become a typical 4th rate citizen complaining that the MAN owes them something. Who then in another 4 years will be charged again with RAPE when the woman they are selling CRACK to can’t pay for it.

    The Politicians in ROCKLAND I live there and it is a little backwards when it comes to Politics.Nothing But Corrupption. If you read the demographics of the area one would not believe what goes on there with cover ups.Yet here we have another cover up.

    And cops in Rockland county ……… all they are good for are pulling people over for speeding and then you have 4 police cars writing a summons. and a 1 det/prt time professor investigating a Brutual RAPE. So happy to see where are money is going.
    I hope that mother sues ORANGETOWN POLICE DEPARTMENT & DOMINICAN COLLEGE and owns both.

    I Hope CUOMO fries them ALL. And Cuomo does a complete investigation into the BACKWARD COUNTRY CORRUPT POLITICS of Rockland County.

  5. Melissa

    amazing – absolutley fucking amazing. So tired of the helpless feeling that comes when reading something like this – I agree – let’s just start the human race over again.

  6. bluespapa

    Arg–painful to read.

    One would think there should be a way to sue the “detective” (sick turd–who could possibly believe the freaking paper wasn’t coerced?! With freaking witnesses!

    Such sadistic inhumanity.

  7. Ryan

    I am not a handwriting expert but if somebody was drugged or drunk to the point of blacking out, then could/should their handwriting really be compared to their anebriated handwriting? My guess is no, and the fact that the cop also worked at the school makes me think his “analysis” was BS.

    What happened to the tape and what happened to the alleged witnesses? My guess is nothing, but since this case never went to trial neither the alleged witnesses or the tape could be subpoened by a court.

  8. TL

    My sister is best friend’s with Megan’s mother. I have known this girl since she was lttle and she would never hurt anyone and this ruined her life. She felt so unprotected. The crazy thing is,when asked why the detective did not investigate this case,he responded~”They only do that on t.v”

  9. eruvande

    How terrible for Megan and her family.

    And how discouraging for those of us who would like to see their rapists get what they deserve. Why would anyone come forward after a story like this?

  10. Daisy

    Reminds me of Jody Foster in the movie “The Accused.” Her role and the story were based on a real event. Jody’s character survived and prosecuted her attackers; Megan never had a chance. Terrible that this can still happen in our country!

  11. Sonya

    This is pretty grotesque. I get so furious we I read stuff like this and know there are hundreds more just like them who will also come to no end other than the rapist getting off.

    My solution – arm yourselves. Get a concealed weapons license, know how to use it and blow their balls off! I’d rather take my chances in a criminal trial for killing some SOB than my chances trying to prosecute the SOB who raped me. At least I could walk away with some self esteem whereas rape the odds are against me.

  12. Cynical Nymph

    This is one of the most revolting things I’ve read, probably EVER. Between this and Lavena Johnson… I mean, I feel like we should just move to Saudia Arabia already.

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  15. BettyBoondoggle

    “My solution –

    remove males from civilized society.

    Sorry. That’s my overwhelming feeling of feebleness and powerlessness talking.

    RIP Megan. I’m sorry.

  16. konstanze

    The fact that the detective also worked at Dominican College should have made him all the more invested in sending these rapists to jail.

  17. Moxy

    Keep doing this. Keep writing about it and telling these stories, even though they are painful. These women need someone on their side, even after death.

    Rape, assault and abuse of women is still very much a secret in our society. That’s why we have to keep talking about it. Each voice that speaks up makes it harder for others to push it all away….

  18. Pingback: Rape myths, rape myth acceptance, and community perceptions of victims of sexual violence — Hoyden About Town

  19. Jane Doe

    i was raped by a man who was identified and convicted to four and a half years in jail, yes by a panel of women judges. Upon appeal, his sentencce was “suspended”. He has never seen the inside of a jail cell.

    I can’t say that the idea of suicide is not tempting.

    1. Cara Post author

      Hi Jane,

      Thank you for your comment, and for sharing your story. You’re not alone, and talking about it is a brave thing to do. I’m very sorry that someone did that to you, and that others have treated you the way they have afterward.

      I’m worried about you, and I hope that you will seek some help. RAINN has 24 hour rape survivor hotlines, and you can call to speak with someone (1.800.656.HOPE), or use their online chat services if that is how you fee more comfortable. If you’d prefer to talk to someone in person rather than online or over the phone, they also have resources for how to find a rape crisis service with in-person counseling in your area, and may even be able to help you with that even if you’re outside the U.S.

      If you feel that you’re in immediate danger of harming yourself, I hope you’ll also please call a suicide hotline like Hopeline. Hopeline offers 24-hour phone hotlines (1-800-422-HOPE, if you’re in the U.S.), as well as online chat and email support. Here are resources for suicide hotlines outside the U.S.

      I’m also a rape survivor, and I also have a history of suicidal thoughts, so I understand that this is very difficult. But I hope that you’ll take care of yourself, and use some of the resources I’ve provided to help you get through this.



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